Part of the application process for my new job as marketing director for a local nonprofit was to write about my spiritual journey in fewer than 500 words. Here is what I wrote:
Although I was raised in the church, I’ve had my ups and downs with God. The greatest part of my testimony is that God was with me during the downs.
The greatest transformation in my spiritual life came when I lived in Uganda for a year, serving as a high school English teacher and missionary with World Gospel Mission. I tell people it was the best and worst year of my life. God used Uganda to destroy me and rebuild me. It wasn’t the extreme poverty, the orphans with HIV, my students who were contemplating suicide, or even the mystery illness I suffered from during and after my year in Uganda that destroyed me. It was an internal struggle that is almost impossible to describe.
The internal struggle, however, is not what this is about. It’s about the transformation that God did on my heart during that time. It’s about how I drastically changed as a person after a year in Africa. I came home to a world that was just how I left it, but I viewed it differently. I was incredibly filled with compassion in a way I never could have imagined.
I began to volunteer in my own community, here in Fort Wayne, Ind. While I still have a heart for international missions, the Lord has revealed to me that He wants to use me here more than anything. I volunteer at the Rescue Mission, as well as other specific events in the community. Perhaps the most moving volunteer experience this past year was at the Allen County Jail where we sang carols and passed out cookies to the inmates for Christmas. I even saw a gentleman I knew from my time serving breakfast at the Rescue Mission. It broke my heart to see him locked up in a cell, but it was worth it to see his eyes light up when I recognized him.
There’s a lot I have to learn. God will never stop teaching me about this world and His place in it, and He’ll never stop working in me. Whether or not I am in a career that directly involves helping people, I’ll always do that on my own in some way. It’s what Jesus did, and it’s what we’re called to do.
Lamentations 3:22 is one of my favorite versus. “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail.” Uganda, and all I experienced there, could have consumed me. I literally felt destroyed. It was the compassion of Christ that put me back together, and now I am a whole new person.